From Top to Bottom

For the past year, I’ve been battling low platelet disease. Don’t cue up violins just yet; watching Alito’s confirmation hearings will probably kill me before ITP. Although my blood issue prevents another pregnancy, nothing more negative has come of it. Instead, quite the opposite.

I’ve attempted to chronicle such struggles (pun intended) with humor – humor and pictures that might get me disowned, but humor nonetheless. A few months ago, Doctor Love prescribed iron supplements to pump up my platelets. Are we all familiar with iron’s added benefits? Much to my parents’ chagrin, people must feel my pain because this particular entry has brought in many new readers. Especially from places like Wisconsin and Minnesota. Makes sense, I suppose. The Midwest is binding.

Who knew constipation was a uniting theme? This humble little lady…okay, ‘lady’ is stretching it...from Wesley Chapel has written an item getting forwarded all over the country. Could the rest of the world be far behind? (Again, pun intended.) My piece on prune juice won’t ever win a Pulitzer, but if I’m lucky it might land in a museum someday along with posts promising a fortune from Europe or emails warning women about perverts armed with perfume samples.

What a week! A story about my breasts appears in The St. Petersburg Times and a story about my tuchis appears in strangers’ inboxes from here to Sacramento. Little girls, listen up: Dreams can come true.

Whom should I thank?