Out of the Frying Pan

I enjoy city living. Big fan. However, while raising our children, we felt it important to raise them around a loving support system.

Yes, we miss culture. We miss free thought. We miss people who read outside the bathroom. Yet our boys are thriving and that's more important. Besides, happiness is self-bestowed. I could be happy anywhere - even in places without cable.

I really could.

We are a little over a month away from uprooting our family and heading west to Colorado Springs. I'm getting more excited and less grumpy as moving day approaches. We've got sisters and best friends out there so a support system is still possible.

And apparently some freaks reside in The Springs as well. So at least we'll feel at home.

This particular article scared the Be-Geezus out of me. I knew about Focus on the Family. Heard of Young Life. Had no idea though that my future neck-of-the-woods is also "home to the greatest concentration of fundamentalist Christian activist groups in American history". I get along with fundies - they find me fetching and ripe for conversion. By the time they realize I'm a lost cause, I've won them over with a combination of spunk and annoying-yet-adorable charm. In other words, they continue to pray for me and occasionally we share a beer.

Still. I'm afraid these new neighbors will be different from the holyrollers I'm used to -

In Pastor Ted’s book "Dog Training, Fly Fishing, & Sharing Christ in the 21st Century", he describes the church he thinks good Christians want. “I want my finances in order, my kids trained, and my wife to love life. I want good friends who are a delight and who provide protection for my family and me should life become difficult someday . . . I don’t want surprises, scandals, or secrets . . . I want stability and, at the same time, steady, forward movement. I want the church to help me live life well, not exhaust me with endless ‘worthwhile’ projects.” By “worthwhile projects” Ted means building funds and soup kitchens alike. It’s not that he opposes these; it’s just that he is sick of hearing about them and believes that other Christians are, too. He knows that for Christianity to prosper in the free market, it needs more than “moral values”—it needs customer value.

I'm sure poor Christians who depend on soup kitchens would beg to differ with him. A "Man of God" and his flock are sick of hearing about the poor and unfortunate among us? A group of evangelicals have come to see Colorado Springs as a modern-day holy city?

As my kids used to say, "I'm ascared."