I'm Going to Tell on You

Dear Disruptive Student,

You:
- are a bully.
- refuse to work.
- make clicking sounds or bang your desk or tap the wall or stomp your feet when I'm helping someone else.
- snore loudly.
- are lazy.
- have lousy taste in friends.
- proudly maintain a zero grade point average.
- snicker when other students ask questions.
- announce after eight weeks of daydreaming, "You don't teach the right way." Then your grandmother calls and say it's my fault you are unmotivated. Sometimes she calls my principal.
- a complete waste of space.
- have parents who don't love you.
- will make everyone pay for it.
- burp or pass gas when the room is quiet and kids are working.
- are lazy, disrespectful and rude
- pretend the ringing cell phone isn't coming from your pants or backpack or purse.
- mumble, "They don't give a sh*t" when I threaten to call home.
- are almost always right.
- enjoy getting a rise out of me or other students. I can control *me* quite easily; however, it's difficult controlling teenagers who want to kill you.

For these reasons and many more, please, stop coming to school. Keep your sad, sorry ass at home with those who are responsible for your particular brand of bullsh*t.

I appreciate it,
Your Annoyed and Nearly-Medicated Teacher