They're After Me. Either That Or I'm Drunk.

Even though I haven't been drinking. Yet.

Check it:

Got home Monday and found a basketball on my front lawn.


Got home yesterday and found three blackened tennis balls on my front lawn.


And the basketball is still there.

Someone's trying to send me a message and I'm hearing it. Loud and clear. They're saying:

I have balls.
I have big balls.
I have black balls.
The Masons are after me.
I need to get the f*ck out of town.

That's right, folks. Crazy like a *fox*.