"What - You Don't Come with a Bottle of Schnapps?"

I'd buy one of these, but who would I call?

Less than a handful of Jews in this town and I already live with seven of 'em. Of course, I could always phone Focus on the Family peeps, ask embarrassing questions and then set up a podcast.

Plus there's the Schnapps.

Speaking of possibilities, I'm still searching for a home to call my own. Heard the market was dead in The Springs, but deals are still hard to come by.

However, the situation could be worse - I could be looking for something affordable in Jerusalem. And tearing my hair out in the process - underneath a sheitel of course.

A depressed market and town, plus the whole "constant bombing threat", and prices are still over a million dollars for less than two thousand square feet.

I know, I know - it's the Promised Land. And there *are* more than five Heebs in that town. But they're the kind that would make me cover my legs. Who needs that?

More Schnapps, please.