Yesterday, Becky's husband got me all excited.

"We're having a party tonight," he said. "Big event going on. Huge."

I slammed down my yogurt drink and shouted,

"G*ddamn right there's a huge event going on tonight - Live Earth! And I'm thrilled that someone in this town, other than me, recognizes what a momentous occasion this is! I have all kinds of ideas. How about, in between organic refreshments, we present tutorials on ways to neutralize our carbon footprints. I can make hemp salad and then-"

"Umm, err, uhh -"

He coughed a little and then said, a bit confused,

"I'm not talking about Live Earth. I'm, umm, talking about Ultimate Fighting Championship."

Awkward pause.

"Of course you are," I said.

And so it came to be that a group of intelligent, educated, professional men and women came over and cheered on the likes of Hammer Head and Pig Ox. Or whatever the hell those fighters call themselves.

No one mentioned Al Gore. Not even once.

Oh, and speaking of Pig Ox, one of the attendees wore this shirt. Just to piss me off:

Didn't want me to take his picture. Luckily, we found a guy on-line who filled it out better anyway.

Yes, folks, how to annoy friends and alienate people. I'm starting to feel at home here already.

So that's something.