Thursday, March 27, 2008

Everywhere I Go

Took the boys to a local park so they could shoot hoops. I know you *think* your kids are rock stars on the court. But your diet coke-drinking, meat-eating, Nick Jr-watching Gator fans of the future are no match for these little Joakim Noahs today.

Believe it.

An elderly gentleman and younger woman walked over to me, all friendly like.

"Those are some fine looking young men you've got there," he said with a cute little twinkle in his eyes.

"Thank you," I said with a smile.

"Are they twins?"

"They are."

"Eight year olds?"

"Very good," I said, laughing. "You know kids, huh?"

"I have twelve grandchildren," he said, motioning to the woman behind him, and looking a bit exhausted. "This is my daughter."

Daughter's eyes seemed glazed. Too much sun or Zoloft. I couldn't tell at first.

"Do you homeschool your boys?" she asked.

"No," I said. "We're visiting from Colorado Springs and it's Spring Break there so we thought we'd come home and thaw out a bit."

"So this is home?" Elderly Gentleman asked.

I nodded. Still smiling. Though Daughter assuming we're Those Types was pushing it.

"Have you had a chance to visit Focus on the Family out there?" she asked, hazy and speaking slowly. Not her fault, though, we were in Lutz after all. "That's in Colorado Springs."

"Ummm, no," I said gently.

"Do you know where it is?" she asked. "Because I have friends who'd be happy to contact you -"

"I know where it is," I said. "I've driven by plenty of times."

"But you don't ever stop?"

"I speed up. You know, fly by like a bat out of hell. Not wanting to catch whatever they've got. If you know what I mean."

I winked and giggled to show I was kidding. Elderly Gentleman winked back but Daughter choked on a chip and got the both of them out of there - post haste. Should have told her to lay off the mood stabilizers and unprotected sex. Give us and grandpa a break.

Good Lord.

They find me, folks. Everywhere I go.

9 Comments:

At 3/27/2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe Someone is trying to tell you something.

 
At 3/27/2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think it is awful that you assume all kids that eat meat, drink a bit of diet coke, and may have watched a little Nick Jr. are GATOR fans. Yikes!

 
At 3/27/2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let us know the next time you're in Land O Lakes - we've got some people we'd really like you to meet. "One of us, one of us...."

 
At 3/27/2008, Blogger Chase Squires said...

Hey, just on an off chance, were those two weirdos named "anonymous" ... seems like there are a lot of people named anonymous, and they all seem to be on some kind of medication :-)

 
At 3/27/2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm. Coming from someone who thinks he's a Golden Age comic book superhero, the accusation that I'm on some kind of medication is.....amusing, at best.

(P.S. The REAL Flash had a much better costume, actually).

 
At 3/28/2008, Blogger Chase Squires said...

Ah, but the rule is, when you can run 100 miles straight, you get to design your own costume.

 
At 3/28/2008, Blogger superdave524 said...

Golden Age Comics? Did someone mention Super Heroes?

 
At 3/28/2008, Blogger superdave524 said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 3/31/2008, Blogger beajerry said...

There's an old Bloom County comic in which the gang sees the new (at the time) AT&T logo and call it the Death Star.
I think about that every time I drive by the Focus On 'Your' Family compound. It is the Springs' Death Star.

 

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