Shining On...

I've noticed that people are grand supporters of my mouth, nerve, writing, chutzpah, bravery...whatever you want to call it.

Until it affects them.

I'll never forget when my children were born and two weeks later they caught RSV. This remains the most frightening time of my life when I wasn't sure if my precious babies were going to make it. Turns out, they're fighters and eventually got well. During their recovery, the powers that be at Massachusetts General Hospital kept Oldest in the NICU and sent Youngest upstairs to the pediatric unit. Youngest was placed in a room with a rambunctious eight year-old and within fifteen minutes I'd had enough of the kid's television, video games, and coughing.

I insisted my *two week-old, premature infant* be given a private room in the crowded hospital. Or else.

They said it couldn't be done.

I was direct and firm.

They gave me the room.

When Husband told his family members, he heard a whole lot of "That's our Katie" and "That's why we love her!"

Right. But when that same directness and firmness is pointed at them, all of a sudden being Katie ain't so great.

And when I bring it up, or talk about my experiences in the world or the experiences of others with a bit of furious anger, I get called "bitter" or stand accused of a "persecution complex."

I don't feel bitter or persecuted. Ever. Especially when I'm calling attention to issues of importance.

A better description would be "empowered."

But my inlaws aren't isolated incidents. A friend of mine has been on the receiving end of a few snide comments and questions lately because of what I have written. As if anyone can explain me or my writing. But all of a sudden, that previous steadfast support isn't presenting itself. Friends can say, "Screw 'em" when it relates to other people. When their own snooty friends are the ones commenting, it's a different story.

Let me be very clear. These people aren't upset that bad or upsetting things occur. They are upset because I *write about it* or *point it out* or *appear on camera.* Not only do they not care about social or personal injustice, they'd also prefer I shut up about it.

Sorry.

I'm always kind of hoping that my mouth, nerve, writing, chutzpah, bravery...whatever you want to call it...will rub off on others. But it never does.